Walking outside is a normal activity that feels free and easy for some people. However, to others they are exhausted and scared of the anxieties the outside world brings.
When it comes to living, safety is key to achieving progression in our world. Finding ways to protect ourselves and others, or spreading the word can help the success rate of many.
safety Recently, in 2024, there was a discovery of a online group chat forum used by around 70,000 members across the world to describe and give advice on how to harm women physically with sexual abuse. This is only one forum that was caught through investigation on that certain topic. 70,000 members. These people lay in disguises as family, friends, coworkers, or a stranger on the street. This is just one reason why many stay inside to protect themselves from the world and others around them.
For many, women especially, it can feel like they are targeted just for being born into a certain identity. Considering that it is mainly women being assaulted on the streets, the focus will be more shifted to their point of view, yet this can apply to anyone who feels unsafe in public settings.
Alearyah Carr is 20 years old and currently lives with her boyfriend in Plattsburgh, New York. She gives a more indepth look of what she must do to protect herself as a biracial, half white independent woman.
Carr wants to raise awareness and share some of her experiences with her safety. “I feel more unsafe outside than I do inside,” Carr said.
The outside world consists of less control of her safety, causing her to avoid going outside, especially when it’s dark. She always goes on a call with a friend with her keys poking out of her balled up fist when walking alone to her call, so she feels more safe and protected during the small duration of being outside. Carr even goes as far as ordering her groceries online to be dropped off at her door, so she doesn’t have to worry about her safety when in public. She mainly only leaves her house to go to her job, school or important appointments and asks friends to come to her when visiting.
Because Carr is biracial, she sees them as more of a threat to her, rather than being protected by them. She knows that not all cops are bad, but for the ones that are, they don’t have an exact look to them to determine the differences. Therefore, she must always keep her guard up for her own protection.
“Systematic things that make me feel unsafe, like police officers… That’s the short answer, they keep killing Black people and I’m Black,” Carr giggled.
Laughing when talking about the situation seems to be a defense mechanism to this sad reality. She referred to Breonna Taylor, a young Black medical worker who died when she was shot by police officers who raided her home.
“ I could be attacked due to my skin. When the police pull me over, I cry and I cry because I feel like they’ll shoot me,” Carr said.
Carr, who majors in both social work and criminal justice, remembers a revealing discussion with a white male student in a criminal justice course. The debate was directed to over-policing within Black neighborhoods. The student said that Black neighborhoods have to be over-policed because Black people are more violent.
“He said that in class out loud! I was in shock,” Carr said.
The sad reality is that the student in Carr’s class has the potential to become a police officer who will then use his bias to determine how he polices people, she said. Striking up conversations and holding others accountable for their actions can help prevent violence and educate potential aggressors. But what troubles Carr is knowing who to guard against.
“Survival of the fittest,” Carr said when it comes to who she feels is against her safety. She treats everyone as a threat, especially if they are acting out of the norm in her eyes, to stay on guard because you never know. She believes that her main threats though are people she couldn’t physically protect herself against, like bigger men.
Carr said she is not able to enjoy a simple walk outside without feeling like she must protect herself in one way or another. But Carr shares that she took her first walk outside with her girlfriends after not doing so in a long time. Although this seems like a small step for someone, this is an accomplishment and a way for her and women around her to take back their power together as they feel safe as one.
Women aren’t the only ones concerned about safety; men feel unsafe as well.
Hunter Hoenschied, who is nonchalantly sure of himself with a good stature, said that he feels anxious being in public at times as well. Hoenschied said that the times he feels uncomfortable or unsafe outside is when he is not familiar with his surroundings. The lack of information of what is happening around him and who to look out for can cause him to feel more on edge, as he feels unprepared to protect himself.
He remembers, after attending a Yankees game with friends, being separated in the chaos and crowds. In this new environment for him, his guard is up and becomes more aware of what is happening around him. “(I feel unsafe with) overly hostile people who are really aggressive or threatening me in any kind of way,” Hoenschied said..
Within this scenario he was likely to bump into someone who could follow that description as a result of how populated the scene was. Luckily he and his friends were able to figure out the situation and got back together.
Fear spikes when we face the unknown, and our survival instincts prepare us for the worst. Hoenschied suggests reaching out for help when you feel unsafe. “I would definitely call a friend or get directions to a more familiar spot so that I have a better understanding of my surroundings,” he said . This familiarity is key to feeling safe when dealing with the unknown that the outside world holds.
Hoenschied said that he doesn’t carry his keys balled in his fist to protect against an attacker, as Carr mentioned that she does. He goes further saying that he does feel more safe because of his gender. Men tend to feel more safe and confident when doing simple outdoor things, like Hoenschied mentioned walking in the dark in familiar spaces outside near home or school.
“I’ve never felt unsafe because of my identity,” Hoenschied said, in regard to his gender. So although men don’t feel as unsafe as women do, it doesn’t mean that their experiences or anxieties are diminished or should be pushed aside. We must all work together for an alternative and gaining control.
Carr and Hoenschied both said that, if they were to see someone causing someone’s safety to feel in jeopardy, that they’d speak up and address their actions and how to solve the problem.
For many women, including Carr, this feels redundant and is given backlash for speaking for their rights. Her battle is tiresome because it is her basic rights and shouldn’t be argued in the first place. She shows passion and acknowledges there is a lack of respect for feminine, weak, or poor people where no empathy is given. Just because one doesn’t feel the same fears or experience the same things does not make the matter unimportant.
Hoenschied addresses the importance of calling out your friends. He believes others shouldn’t turn a blind eye when seeing negative patterns within their friendships with one another, because then, you’re just as guilty.
Both Carr and Hoenschied agree all voices matter in this battle for safety reformation, and finding help for anyone struggling. There are services and online outlets you can seek out. Support groups may exist in your community or online, and may also provide defense classes or videos as well. You can also go to the store and find items that you can use to protect yourself like pepper spray or a taser, depending on your residency.
Checking on your friends and family to build a support system is always courageous and empathetic. Help you and others to become protected and safe in this unpredictable world.
By Sydney Blake
apnmag.com 